This is the last installment of a blog series that will dispel the 10 most common and stubborn myths parents believe about exposing children to alcohol.  Today we tackle big, fat myth #10: If I used alcohol or other drugs as a teen, I guess I’ll have to lie about it to my children or it will give them permission to do the same thing…

I saved the best for last!  This one is tough – I’ve been thinking about it for almost 20 years.  I don’t think you have to lie – if your child asks you about your own life, he or she is looking for the ultimate outcome, not the gory details…I think it can be a fruitful conversation to let your kids know that you struggled, too and explain to them why you don’t use now (I’m assuming that’s the case!).  I would say as little as possible about the details of your escapades and stick to the discomforts and consequences.  This is not a time to reminisce about wild fraternity parties or the summer you spent on tour with The Grateful Dead…If you no longer take drugs, there is likely a solid reason for that – put some thought into how and why you brought that chapter of your life to an end.  The most important message you can send is that you presently view alcohol and other drug abuse as unsafe and unhealthy.  Believe it or not, many parents got through the psychedelic seventies and eighties without using alcohol or other drugs.  If you were a non-user in high school, this is a powerful and compelling story – tell your child about the joys and challenges of non-use and how you came to that decision.  Regardless of your background, I think the truth is in order – kids can handle the truth, especially when it’s told sparingly and appropriately…